Julia Roberts extolls Motherhood

by julia_2x on June 4, 2010

Julia Roberts waxed eloquent about motherhood of her two twins, Phineas and Hazel (age7) and their brother Henry (age 4.)  Article link.    She joyfully points out one of the life-lessons of motherhood that we discuss in Motherhood to Otherhood.

She points out that her kids are excited about everything.  The world is still new and intriguing.  “Look at the Tree!”  one will say from the backseat, and she’ll be reminded to bring herself back into the present moment and back to the pleasures of where she is, and who she is with. 

Beginner’s Mind is what it is sometimes called, and it is a worthwhile quest.  There is nothing more exciting than beginning.  There’s exciting new things to see and try, and people to meet or books to read.  The beginning grabs us and holds us.

What happens in “the middle”?  We get bored.  We don’t sustain our beginner’s mind.  We don’t continue to push for new beginnings within the endeavor or project. We don’t feed our childlike glee, curiosity and sense of wonderment within the process.

“Look at the tree!”  I’m sure your kids (now or in the past) provide you with all sorts of grounding observations, deep questions, excitment and awe.  When we want to sustain our pleasure in our daily tasks, or within a grueling undertaking – like sticking ot a diet, or writing a novel, or stripping the wood in your living room – we need to let that childlike joy, presence and curiosity dwell within us.

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Moms don’t spend on themselves – why?

by julia_2x on May 26, 2010

As of 2007, women are out-earning their husbands in more than one third of HHs– up from 17.8% in 1987!!  This number is likely increase dramatically since then bec of the recession.  2/3 of jobs lost in the economic downturn were men.  Read the full article on Careers MSNBC.com for more insight into trends and drivers behind this big change.

Moms are still cutting back spending on themselves… (read the full Adweek article) despite the shift in earning power.  45% of moms have completely eliminated anything they don’t feel is absolutely necessary from their lives.  Another 29% of moms downgrade or cut back spending, and target their own luxuries first. 

Even though moms are shouldering primary earning responsibility in 33.6% of families, a full 74% of them are cutting back, selflessly.  We could chalk that up to the necessities of the economy.

So then I need to know… how is dad’s indulgent spending in this economy? Do they invest in themselves when they need it?  Here’s a great pie chart on where the money goes, but not who spends what in the marriage. 

It is my experience in the 7 years I’ve been offering seminars to moms that they fell guilty spending on themselves, even when it’s an investment in their future and happiness.  The kids get tap lessons, but not you.  Your husband needs to unwind with a round of golf, but you’re good with a  TV or a nice dinner or a board game.  We are working to be happy more cheaply on an everyday basis.  But we are not reaping the benefits for ourselves. 

This is all great.  It is an estimable value to live well on what you earn.  I just question whether we take equity in what we earn for our families, what we need to be happy and productive and lead full and independent lives.

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8 GR8 Tips for Overcoming Infertility

May 21, 2010

Infertility or impaired fecundity (ability to carry a child to term) can be utterly heartbreaking. And they affect over 7 million American women – or about 12% of us.  And moms who secretely suffer from secondary infertility find little support or acknowlegment.  Since they have a child the second or third child they are not […]

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May 7, 2010

Happy Mother’s Day!  you know the thousand things we tell our kids everyday – eat your vegetables, smile, sit up straight.  sometimes they make sense in the long run… other times?  here’s a little Mother’s Day treasure for you.  Mothers Day Card – Momsense Hope you enjoy it.

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Women Food and God

April 15, 2010

This book has been a true inspiration and challenge to all that we would-be weight-losers hold dear. (would that be our fat? our thoughts about our fat? our food? and our thoughts about our food?) If you’re willing to give up dieting forever. Love the body you’re in. And encourage the beautiful person within to […]

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Goals that Excite Action

March 3, 2010

I’m in weight loss coaching with the great Brooke Castillo, and she shifted the paradigm on goal setting for me. This particular shift in perspective is so amazing I want to share it with YOU! So, has this ever happened to you? You set a goal, you think “I’M GOING TO DO THIS!!” and then […]

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Shake it Off

February 24, 2010

I just had a long conversation with another coach who was driving (don’t tell the authorities) to body psychotherapy. Much like EFT and Shake Therapy – this is a primal way of locating and feeling your feelings. Your body has wisdom way beyond your mind, she tells me. I’ve so long been intelligent, funny, clever, […]

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Diet, what diet?

February 8, 2010

I’ve had a crazy time of it… just before I was supposed to start a diet on February 1st, Istarted panicking – not just because of the diet, but bec of real concerns, some bad news, worries.  You know the mom drill.  A couple of whopping disappointments and who you gonna call?  I only have the […]

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Beginner’s Mind

December 15, 2009

Well, I have a miserable cold that just came on Sunday morning.  Did that keep me from googling a  Lowes, WalMart, Target and AC Moore all in close proximity to one another, and going out in the freezing rain to buy, return and try to find the last Christmas lights on any shelves in Northern […]

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Just Look at Your Feet!

December 12, 2009

This is the time of year when people and pets trudge in with snow and dirt and salt. And we sock footed stay-at-homers get annoyed!  But I’m writing to share a different point of view on “Look at your feet.” Go ahead… look at your feet. Do you see where you’re standing right now? Where […]

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